Not blogging anymore

Yes, I am working on dissembling the blog for good. I don't have the time and ambition to blog any longer.

However, I am still here - so e-mail me or call me.

Excitement!

So much has been going on! Life just keeps taking different turns and it seems to get better and better.

D and I went ring shopping last Friday and looked around. Then on Monday, he took half a day off of work and we went looking at rings again and I found the ring I was destined to get. It is white gold with 4 diamonds spaced along the band and the band has a ribbon-like look that just sparkles and feels good to have on my finger. There are no parts that stick out that I can scratch someone with - it's a beautiful and wonderful ring. D took me to Bridgits Cross as they sized it for me and we sat and enjoyed our afternoon together. We also chose his ring and put it in a payment plan so we can get his when we can - it actually matches mine - diamonds spaced along the ring but he has a thicker band without the ribbon emphasis like mine but has a straight line through the center of the ring.

Also, I am waiting anxiously next to the phone. I am waiting to hear about a job - one that I feel would be perfect and fun to do. I just want to jump right in and start working. Also, I have some of Bill's papers to do yet, he needs them handed in by this weekend. I've gotten pretty far - not too bad. :-)

Keeping our fingers crossed

1 out of 3, I just tried on my interview outfit for tomorrow mornings meeting... looks good :) I quite excited, a bit nervous, but I know that will pass quickly.

I am looking forward to everything!!

I have been so busy, It has been CrA Zy! I just turned in my final grades for students at Upward Bound, we had our huge dance/potluck and last teacher meetings and etc etc etc.

I have another possibility for the future (August) in case all else fails. So much to do!

Computer is doing an awful sound... my $99 power supply is smacking some wires next to the fan... I am NOT happy. I may just call the company and tell them off.

Everything else is good - lots of grading has gone down and now I am free - but terribly poor. hehe There are NO movies, outings, eating out, or anything in my recent future. Just doing cheap activities. Ah well. I will be working on Bill's stuff anyway. :-)

Hope all is well with everyone else!

Nope, Just off the face of the blog-o-sphere

B-Dawg, I'm still here, just extremely busy. Sorry everyone!

Let's see... I am teaching at Upward Bound at BSU and having a complete blast! This is one of the more fun jobs I've gotten to do. I am teaching high school, and it gives me a chance to see what it's like.

I love the program - I hope to go back to it some summer.

I am also busy looking for a job for the fall. I have no idea what I am doing yet, and the UB program is ending NEXT week! It's crazy. I hope that I may get called for an interview for the Resident Hall Director job this week - I am looking so forward to the interview and hopefully working for res. life again. I love BSU and that would be exactly what I would want to do.

I did get a call from a comm. college in Grand Rapids but it is for part time and the problem with that is the amount of gas to drive back and forth and the difference of that and being paid a part time salary - I am not too sure how well that will go.

I am also house sitting on the side. Which I have been aminly going in everyday to check on it and make sure everything's ok. I haven't had the time to really move in or anything. But, she had said it would be ok if I couldn't.

I have a meeting in about hal an hour - so I am going to be a bit brief.

Oh, and I am also still working with Bill on papers and getting him set up. Hopefully all that works - but one problem is that my computer died at my house and all it does is circle around the Windows XP intro screen and then back to the "safe loading" section. Crazy stuff! I am missing my computer, but I am so busy that it hasn't hurt me yet.

Hope this helps you guys figure out what I am doing.

I am graduated with a masters.... I am summer employed... am am falll unemployed.... and I am hoping everything works out.

Oh, and PS, D and I are still together and we talk about the future all the time. Everything is wonderful in that arena. So glad I have him by my side, I'd be lost without him.

It's been almost a month

Yes, I am still alive. And kicking.

I've been teaching Upward Bound writing classes and trying to find that job for fall. At least I was able to get a summer job - and one I love!

I just finished planning my lesson plan for tomorrow and am excited to see what the students do with the project.

I have B's papers still and I am hoping he isn't too stressed as of now. Hopefully all of that work out all right. Also, DE reminded me she needed a house sitter so I may move into town for a bit - I guess a bit cheaper on gas or so... or I'll probably just stop in and check the house off and on. I don't know - I'll just call her tomorrow and see what we can do.

Haven't seen Aspen in a while - she's so busy with two jobs,its crazy! And of course I am always running around, either work, to D's parent's house or in town for some reason. Having lunch with D everyday, though. He works on campus so I can find him whenever and we eat lunch and discuss everything.

I guess thats all I have - so busy its just nuts. Hopefully all the work will bring forward a job for the fall :D

Week 2

Week two is almost done. I haven't gotten any positive replies to anything I have applied for yet. I guess I just keep right on going and cross my fingers.
I plan on applying for the Alumni Events position at BSU, and if anything happens at Residential Life, that job also. My hope is that one of those will work or I can find a teaching position in the summer job search. It seems the jobs just pop up from time to time and I could be lucky one day.
I have many things to do yet, and so little time. I was promising myself to take it easy this summer this morning, because I have been worrying and tense these last few months... or year and I can feel it in my shoulder muscles - very sore and tight.

To do list:

• Pick up reference form from RL
• Fix up application packet for alumni event at BSU
• Go through my letters, resume's, and Curriculum Vitae and print off some good copies
• Organize my job search folder on desk for easy application
• Post my information at monster jobs
• Print off some more of my Transcripts and order some more official ones from UNT and BSU
• Relax and Enjoy my Summer!!

Organized Chaos

Yes, yes. I am all up in there with my organized self.. procrastinating and fulfilling to do lists at the same time. How does she do it folks? She does it with a twitch of the eye for 12 hours straight and a dazed nap of 3 hours in the middle of the day because she feels exhausted after a good 8 hours sleep at night. Sleeping must be so hard on me.

Ok, well, here it goes.

• Wake
• Dress
• Breakfast
• Pay bill - mail out bill
• Drop off Thesis at HS office for RW and letters for others (and DE's book!)
• Stop in at Residential Life - speak to RL and perhaps LK? Or find MM or SH
• If I have Forms filled out, bring to Concordia LV (Grab up Aspen)
• Go home, eat lunch
• Work on bills and calendar
• Work on my resumee and letter for Fall job (Alumni)
• Clean up around house
• Make Angel Food Cake for party?
• Get ready for my brother and his wife!!!! Whoohoo

"perfect"

somone out there thinks im perfect.... and I believe him. Such a cozy feeling.

List for tomorrow

• Cap and gown
• cell phone
• purse
• card with name
• shoes i can stand in on a slight incline
• my thesis
• nice outfit
• car cleaned out
• signs up or balloons?
• nice pen to sign thesis

"coming back" by Crystal Method

Well, I had my final class at BSU tonnight. 6-midnight. I presented my paper topic - Criseyde and Courtly Love (Chaucer). We ate pizza - DE bought it for us, awesomest professor - and we enjoyed our last night.

After that, I went to my office in the library and packed up 4 bins and a duffel bag of my stuff - cleaned it up and closed the door for the last time. I didn't really get attached to that office, but that desk in the center of third floor was my home for many many many hours.

Oh, and I got the letter explaining the other college I applied to to teach at saying they are doing interviews and I was one of the ones not chosen. /sigh

So, to do this week:

• Get check for Bryan
• Check messages on phone in dorm
• get carpet out of dorm and into dumpster
• Give cats a bath - good grief they are dirrrrty
• Mail check to St Jude's for Hall Council
• Sort through my bins of assorted junk
• Graduate
• Find a job
• Drop off book for Deanna
• more to come

Hmm Emo Bags

So much fun :) Chibi Generator

Gaming Night

Games for Families

This is basically what I did when I moved from TX to MN. And now I play with my brother off and on, and with D and Aspen. A way to have fun and talk.

BACK UP YOUR JUMP DRIVE!!!!

Aya! says:

OMG, I almost had a heart attack ....

Aspenator says:

?

Aya! says:

I was working on my paper and had my jumpdrive inserted into the computer.. its sittin on floor so the jumpdrive string is on floor.

Aya! says:

Janitor comes along and I move so he can vacuum

Aya! says:

hehe SCHLOOOK chunk CHUNK CRUNCH

Aspenator says:

uh oh

Aspenator says:

hehehe

Aya! says:

I just stand there with my eyes wide and almost dead when he picks up vacuum and hands me the two plastic pieces of my jumpdrive to me

Aya! says:

no insides, just the snapped outside shell

Aspenator says:

lol

Aya! says:

so he starts looking through the bag and I look down at the floor at bits of the string and such

Aspenator says:

and?

Aya! says:

AND the insides of the jumpdrive are still in the computer, light flickering... i give it a nudge and it connects an I download ALL the content onto the myfolders on this computer

Aspenator says:

wow

Aya! says:

hehe so i snapped the plastic shell around and withdrew it and it works fine LOL

Aspenator says:

lucky

Aya! says:

yah telling me, whew

Aya! says:

he taped it for me LOL

Aspenator says:

hehe that's a close one

Aya! says:

i have a ghetto jumpdrive

Aya! says:

too close, not sure when last time I backed it up, naughty me

Aspenator says:

DUCT TAPE!

Aya! says:

scotch hehehe

Aya! says:

Im gonna blog this conversation so I dont hafta retype it hehehe

Aspenator says:

*grin

Aya! says:

so say something naughty real quick hehhe


She didn't reply in time... sorry - you'll hafta ask her if she ever did say something naughty

So much to do, so much to do

Well, this weekend I enjoyed a LOT. Ran around a lot and hung out with mom and finally decided to just stow all my stuff in the downstairs bedroom and just sleep upstairs. In that way, I can have a closet - ill just have to run down to get my clothes is all.

Monday was fun. I did some errands, had lunch with everyone, took my nap and then headed out with Aspen.
We cleaned up her apartment and made it look niiiiiiice. Of course, we worked on it from 6pm until 1am. But it looks awesome! We'll hafta get pictures. I even washed the glass globes for her hanging lights - go me! - mom would be proud ehehehe

I slept in a LONG time today. 11am. Now, Im doing laundry, called a lot of people, set up times for meetings and have things settled.
Today / Tuesday

• Wash clothes (they are washing as I type)
• Pick up D after work (4pm)
• Eat dinner
• Class from 6-9
• Come home and pick up floor signups for camp out
• Make signs for possible weather problems tomorrow

Tomorrow/ Wednesday

• Wake
• Shower
• Dress
• Lunch
• Pick up Checks
• Shop for Camp Out (If its not too rainy)
• 4pm meet in front of Oak front desk for Oak Stock
• 5pm look at going to get rdy at Oak Stock
• 6-9ish Oak Stock
• 9+pm weather permitting, Oak Camp Out with food and tents
• Sleeo

Next Next day / Thursday

• Sleep in
• Wake
• Shower/Dress
• 11:28am Appointment /shudder
• Rest the rest of the day and get my Thesis Printed
• Work 6-midnight

Friday

• Sleep in
• Wake
• Shower/dress
• Get Thesis Printed
• Get boxes for packing
• Work 4:45-8:45pm

Saturday

• Pack
• Pack
• Pack
• Work on Paper for DE class (Troy)

Sunday

• See Saturday

Monday

• Pack
• Work on Bills paper

Edited Post for first time in my life.

Yes, cranky and with good reason. [edited] neighbor [edit] two friends [edit] stupid [edit] Last night they were finally caught by an RA [edit] floor is rejoicing [edit]

1) Knocking at 3amish on all the doors
2) slamming his own door every three minutes
3) Tearing down signs and door decorations
4) Snorting snot onto our carpeted hallways - YES, he does and I hear it off and on and some have caught him. He just shrugs us off
[edit]
7) Talking on the phone as if he were talking to the actual person from 30 miles away. I swear he needs to learn that we can hear *everything* through these walls if he's loud enough.

But, all that aside... Lots going on. So I suggest cleaning your room, opening the window to the nice cool and rainy air and listening to Korn... Issues Album of course. Hopefully he hates this music ;) If not, I'll change it to Marilyn Manson.

D I N G !

Yesterday, I was nervous up until 2 minutes into my thesis defense and then the dam broke - I felt like, well yah, i wrote the darn 65 pages, I *can* talk about it for an hour or two easily! Which is what we all did. I even have an idea about some future topics to write about thanks to my committee members. Just so happy and relieved that I passed.

Now, I am working on my paper for Troy class - which is actually making me look at the Chaucer play a lot more closely than earlier and I'm finding some interesting things. Can't wait to get that paper finished and give that presentation.

This weekend, I plan on grabbing my boxes at home and packing up some extra things - I need to be moved out before graduation since I have to be checked out by that saturday and thats when ill be in Minneapolis. hehe

Today:

• shower
• dress
• clean up room
• rejoice some more
• Emails
• Work on phone and get stuff going again
• Go buy the 20$ cert. at Applebees and the 10$ at Amigo for tonight - Get these to A
• pick up D at 4pm
• Eat dinner
• Work 6-midnight at Library

Yipes

Thesis defense is tomorrow.

in... 14 hours

about 9 of those will be me... sleeping hehe

• Wake around 8:30-9pm
• shower/dress
• Print out one more copy of thesis
• go to Union and meet with D and Aspen - eat lunch
• leave at 11:30 and go home to pace room/go to Luekens
• leave dorm room at 12:30 and head to Hagg Sauer
• Defend thesis at 1:15pm
• Go home afterwards and either cry, watch tv mindlessly, or laugh hysterically
• check phone messages
• eat dinner
• go to work 6-midnight.
• Work on my paper for Troy class

To Do's piling up

Today and Tonight:

• Call LL about stage and sound in after 4pm
  
• call L at hupb? - left message and emailed
  
• Call Cody left message
  
• Call JK - about playing bagpipes
• E-Mail everyone OHC and LL
• Read Henryson
• Fix up Thesis a bit more
• Buy Prizes for Assassins Quick Draw Game (Thursday night!)
• Class 6-9pm
• Relax at some point and play games until defense? hehehe

Purple

ASPEN LOOKY THERE- Did someone say PURPLE?
Found it linked off of the User Friendly webcomic.

Also, 2 out of 3 comp tests are done ... R E J O I C E !

So, off to work on my next one.

A Burberry London fog

I love the Burberry perfumes out there... and lately have been trying the London scent... totally delicious. Not sure if anyone else likes it, but I sure do.

Well, I haven't been blogging on account of so MUCH going on... but here we go:

• Keep up with E-Mails for Hall Council
• Call up LL tomorrow morning or stop in
• Get LL's signature for Check Request - Yay, I finally called and got vendor numbers!
• Hand in to DE my comp test
• Talk to RW about topics for my Comp Test
• Get Signatures on Thesis Defense paperwork
• Work on final paper for Troy class
• Find a Summer Job
• Find a place to live - D and I been looking around and discussing options
• Check my phone messages daily for a job possibility
• Frame the letters of rejection for Phd's - heeheh
• Send email to professor at Duluth about programs
• Go to my bank and ask about School Loan
• Talk to records about loan deferrment and loan stuff - i think we *Have* to do this in order to get diploma...?
• Defend my thesis on April 26th at 1:15pm in HS. WHOOOHOOO o
• Graduate on the 12th - look into having party that night - let's not make it difficult
• Work 5 more nights EEEHHEHEEEE
• Get Jer a present this Friday
• Get check request for the Oak Camp Out
• Buy food for Camp Out
• Buy Prizes for Games
• Pack up my office in Library
• Pack up my stuff from Oak Hall Council Office
• Start packing up my bedroom and get rid of the clutter first

Winding down on some

Well, thesis is practically done. My Defense date is set for Wednesday, April 26th at 1:15-3ishpm. in HS 329 if anybody is desperately wanting to hear about Beowulf and Icelandic Saga women. ;-) My latest version of thesis is sitting on my desk, ready to be brought into the Graduate office for format scouring. Hopefully not too much is wrong with it. Also, I been in touch with the grad office a lot today and feel better about some of my timing being a bit off.

Im tempted to take a nap - have had no caffiene today, trying my best to stay away from it. The sun is so bright, though. I should be outside running around, but i just feel tired. hehe What I get for being used to naps :P

I have had some good news in job possibilities. I put my name into the pool at Residential Life, in case anything opens up there. I also called the community college office and was told they were *just* starting selection processes and probably won't hear from them for a good 2 weeks. Ah well.
My to do list:

• Talk to Ll about SunSplash
• Make a list of things to buy for OakStock and Campout
• Email everyone about Meeting for Monday - 8:30ish should be good
• Sunday is Easter at Moms!
• Comp Test Email to RW
• Comp Test to DE
• 10-20 pger for Troy class

hehe Awesomeness comes in small packages

Dooce brought me to Yogabeans - a whole 8 inches of fun with plastic Yoga toys.

Wow

Well,

My previous to do list was getting smaller and smaller. I have so much going on, its crazy! I am starting to run into the Oak Hall Council stuff that I've had to put to the side, but I think I can start really looking into that now.

• Schedule a meeting tomorrow night for EXEC meeting
• Call for Vendor Numbers
• call Cdy about band and meeting
• Figure out schedule and resources needed for bands
• Jarva?
• Camping gear and supplies
• Money orders

Also, I have some promising reports for jobs and I am so glad BSU is a remarkable school. If you haven't gotten involved with the school and the people and all the activities, you are really missing out! I have to say that I have felt more at home here ever since Steve from Birch/Linden approached me about being in Hall Council and it all snowballed from there. Completely changed my life and my outlook on what college entails. It's not only learning from classes, its learning from the students/residents and faculty! (Lol, im starting to sound like an ad, sorry folks - just the way I feel about BSU)

Stress and Excitement

Well, the thesis has been sent out to the committee members. The date, however, is not confirmed yet for my defense. Hopefully the decision on a time and place won't became a huge issue. To do listings will have to be interspersed in order for it to be complete for tomorrow.

• E-Mail committee members for possible dates for defense of thesis
• E-Mail Dr. K about thesis

Also, I have looked at the Pioneer for a job. Ugh. Not much in jobs there so this summer I may just have to find one of those fun jobs where i get paid min. wage. :P

• Call College human services about jobs - Left MSG
• Talk to SH - email about list for adjunct
• Talk to L's neighbor about tech

Have been looking at places to live - quite a lot of places out there but I drove by a few and they don't look very nice. .sigh But... I think I'll be calling a lot of them tomorrow to see what the Apt's have and how much. Perhaps that can work.

• Call Apt's and other renting places numbers

Of course I am having lunch with D and Aspen tomorrow at 10:30, should stop by DE's office and talk to her about my Comp test.

• Finish comp test for DE
• Email possible topices to RW

Oh and YAAAY I don't work the rest of the week after Monday. OMG, ehehe I am so excited. I'll have MORE than a week off. /bounce. I have worked so much, but it was desperately needed and that paid off in my resolve to get my thesis worked on and finished.

• Wash dishes
• Wash single load of clothes

Last time I washed clothes, I spent about 13$ and took 5 washers the first time and 3 after that. It was completely crazy!

And.. im wearing a skirt - first time in a loooonnnnnnng time. Feels pretty good :-)

Fun with the camera

Jer and D showed me a camera that is connected to the computer/monitor of some new machine (have no idea how to describe) and I was able to have some fun with the different settings with the camera - no, that really isn't what my butt looks like ... its slightly flatter ;-) Here is the best shot I have ever had done of my rear. I was laughing so hard and couldn't wait to get it up on the blog. :-)

Here you guys go! Boom ba da Boom!

...../blaaaahhhh\.....

1. shower
2. dress
3. get LL signature
4. drop off chk req at Deputy
5. drop off the drafts of my thesis
6. meet 4th member of committee at bangsberg
7. lunch at 10:15 in union
8. bank - jers $$
9. post office - chk mail and send off bills stuff
10. go home and nap - so tired
11. work on signs for Hall council - should have been up a week ago - but im just so busy
12. call vendor numbers? gah

it's a beautiful thing - 64 or so pages of text that you put a year into... its pages were so nice and warm when they came out of the printer. and the weight is so hefty hehe and looks mighty spiffy with a large clip

About to Close down the Library

But, oh my GOSH!

I think im almost done. And I mean *done*! I have everything written... it is all placed nicely in a package... Deanna just has 3 chapters to look over and I'll rework them tomorrow night... and then... KAPOW - out it goes

Uh oh, i gotta go close library now, dangit now im hyper heheehehehe

Totally Exhausted

I did finish editting at 9am.. so basically i worked straight on 60 pages from 9pm (library until midnight) to 9am.... 12 Hours! That's the hand written editting with the subsequent typing editting. Yet, I was still wide awake when I went to drop off my stuff. Albeit, I was totally mumbling and not understood because I couldn't think straight, but I was able to hold a conference with a very relieved DE and she is hoping (me too) that we can send out my drafts to the others in my committee and set a date for the 28th this month for my defense. /bounce

After I talked with DE, I went home, shut the blinds and crawled into bed. 1pm until 4:30... not enough! But, I had to eat dinner so I dragged myself out of bed and ate with D and now im stuck at the library until midnight. Its 8pm... and im barely conscious... but kinda hanging in there. My arms are super sore and tired from typing and writing, and my eyes kinda wiggle a bit looking around... but I think I can make it. hehee think I can, think I can.

Working on my conclusion.... I know what I want but I am doing this on very little sleep and a depleting supply of caffiene. mmm I had choco icecream after dinner.. neener

wanna go home now.. :P

Still Awake

Not doing so good, but i finished what I needed to and im STILL awake, which is just CRAZY!

so, going to head to lunch and hopefully will see those that usually go are there... not sure on what's going on, so I'm winging it hehe. you know who you are! Stress=bad and so i am trying not to have stress beyond my thesis.. but stress just finds me bah!

k, going downstairs to see if i made the oak printer blow up hehehe 60+ pages can do that I hear

lalalal

yep.. still wide awake - some flippin' good coffee! I am a little sore in the shoulders... but my eyes only blur off and on atm hehe

gads, im gonna be sleeping during light hours tomorrow :P Not sure if im going to stop editing - i only just finished page 30/65

Yaaaaar

uh huh
uh huh
cooffffeeeee and gumm..... and only 16 pages into thesis.... yaaarrr

uhh i need sleep hehe

Ahhhhh

Pulling an all nighter tonight.

Oh yeah, the smell of coffee at 2am in the morning. For some reason it kinda tastes like perfume... wonder if its been exposed to waftage hehe

Oy, my thesis is still too rough for giving out... i need to get this better draft to Deanna asap tomorrow and so that means I may be dead walking tomorrow - so excuse me if im totally blanked out. PS dont mean to be ignoring ppl, sorry! But holy cow, you guys have NO idea .. unless yer one of the other 2 who are also working on thesis' heheh

oh BTW... for those working ont thesis - that Table of Contents was terrible to figure out. Took me a long time to get that stupid dot leader thing to work :P

Tomorrow

Yet, another list

• 9amish - bring in check request to LL
• Bring Check Request to the offices
• drop off new version of Thesis - Sorceress Chapter and conclusion
  
• Check bill's mail - send off his package of mail
• Eat Lunch??
• Work more on thesis
• probably need a nap in here somewhere
• Hopefully pick up check for N's games - or tomorrow
• Dinner @ Wally's
  
• Work yet again 6-midnight

*subject to change hehe

Tonight is going fast!

Yes, another 5 night working stint from 6-midnight begins tonight. Although, I came to work and sat right down to edit my thesis and .... sheesh, the time flew! I am only halfway through chapter One on editting! I so should have worked on it yesterday, but I was enjoying my nights off of work after last weeks 5 night stint.

Let's see, my to do list might be good:

• Finish editting as much as possible
• Contact Uni of Michigan
• Contact SDU
• Breathe
  
• Contact RW about comptest
• Contact SH for letters
• Contact other thesis committee person
• Wash clothes
• Call Deanna - make appt with her on Tuesday or Wed.
• Pay bills
• Breathe
  
• Make Curriculum Vita - email to Jn
• Buy my graduation robes (eeee wizardy robe and colored hood!!)
• Pay my loan bill
• Check Bills mail and send package to him of his stuff
• Breathe
  
• work for 4 more nights :P
• Eat quick dinners with D - but remember Tuesday is a loner night!!! heehe
• Send in check Request (hope its not too late)
• Call for vendor numbers
• Breathe
• Make some more lists for next week or for easier daily ones...
• Look into making a "sticky" to do list
  

90s heavy metal, Beowulf and Sunflower seeds...

Perfect combo! For some reason, I have needed the energy from heavy metal music to get me to type. It's crazy! I've been enjoying some Metallica, Megadeth, White Zombie, Godsmack, Ministry, Helmet, Danzig, Alice in Chains, System of a down, POD, even some NIN and Tool thrown in for good measure. Oh, and of course some Rage Against the Machine and Drowning Pool. /shrug

If I and Aspen were still roomies, she'd be kicking me heheheh As it is, D comes over here and .. lol... he says it doesn't even sound like music. I guess the beat and the energy is all I look for... and maybe some of those lyrics from constant listening. Yay, Rammstein came on - back to work I go!

Oh and.. LOL I found this last night linked off of a classics video clips site: Old School Disney Video that must have scared the bejeezies of those poor kids! hehe I can just imagine the dropped jaws and wide eyes in the health classroom. Those funny cartoon characters are so.. so.. EVIL - bad touch, bad touch!!

Oh, also I had the craziest dream last night!
I went to this huge mansion where it had two LARGE levels and then two more stories above, half the size as the lower parts. I was visiting a friend and we started running around exploring - it was an old place with tons of windows and spooky rooms. We finally realized the place was haunted on account of the elevator that brings us up to the 3rd and 4th level. There was some wierd stuff going on. However, my friend was having a party in the backyard and so we were down there for a while while people went in and out. At one time I went to find a bathroom and I ended up finding the LARGEST shower area ever, there were showers in a sort of wierd maze like area and I brough some others in to look too. When I got to the elevator, I and a few others went up, about a dozen of us. We got to the 4th level and it was a huge room with tables all set up as if it had been a restaurant. The windows were very dingy and for some reason we decided to stay there.

We all chose some tables next to the windows and suddenly the ghosts started just coming out and being all scary - one guy was all bubbly and had an eyeball in his mouth and he could see out of it (i am assuming he had burned and it slowly dripped down to cover his mouth) - I know, greusome, but just telling you what I can remember-. We all got scared and the people at my table all held hands and when one ghost came sleazing past from a black window on my right I got totally peeved and slammed my fist into the glass. I was still holding the hand of the person across from me when I started screaming and then was surprised to see EVERYONE in the room become very very very old. I remember feeling the wrinkles in her hand. The ghost that had passed around me earlier looked right at me and I was yelling at everyone, asking why they were all old and why I hadn't changed.

The ghost told me that I wasn't one of the living people in the room, that I was a ghost and when I looked at the blacked out window I realized that for some reason in the past when I was alive, I had been the one to break it. The woman still holding my hand told me to get out of the house, that i wasn't safe and I needed to find a way out. Well, I suddenly realized I was trapped in the house by the other spirits and I searched for a way out. Everything turned into a blur of running and all I can say is that eventually I got out of the house, but I had nowhere to go because I would cease to exist because no one would know I was there. In the house, the older women had known who i was and knew where to find me, but out in the woods, away from recognition, I slowly became nothing and thats the end of the dream.

Talk about wierd - I hadn't had one of those kinds of movie-like dreams in a while. I did enjoy enacting it all out, I know for a fact that I was talking in my sleep hehe I can sort of remember being very vocal and talkative.

So many symbols lol

I checked out an astrology thing on MSN - don't usually do this, but it sure was interesting.

Me

Pisces (February 18 - March 19) is the mutable water sign, and is dreamy,
imaginative and otherworldly. Associated with: religious teacher, monk/nun or a
photographer; fish; Dolphin; Neptune; red-violet; poppy; pearl; number twelve;
feet, toes, lymph, glands; and the setting is a cathedral.

- Not sure if this is anything that I have dreamt... the setting of my last dream was cathedral-like, but was more or less set in my school basement/tunnels. And my cat, Bear, was following me around as a kitten and we were running into all sorts of people down there.
D

Sagittarius (November 22 - December 20) is the mutable fire sign, and is
adventurous, curious and wise. Associated with: hunters, horseback riders, and
explorers; archery; Centaur; Jupiter; blue; Rush; Jacinth; number nine; hips,
thighs, arteries, base of spine, pelvis; and the place is around a campfire.

- Heheh, not sure about dreams, but he does play a ranger in GW. Back hurts off and on too - poor guy.
Aspen

Scorpio (October 23 - November 21) is the fixed water sign and is introverted,
intense, and magnetic. Associated with: grim reaper; dark figures, an exotic
person; Scorpion; Eagle; Phoenix; Mars; Pluto; blue-green; Cactus; Turquoise;
number eight; bladder, genitals, colon, prostate, uterus, sex organs; and the
setting would be a bedroom.

- LOL whooohooo Aspen.... she is exotic in her quest of New Zealand... and Cactus sounds like TX.... but the rest of that /wolf whistle hehehehe
Mom

Aries (March 20 - April 18) is the cardinal fire sign and is active, dynamic and
action oriented. Associated with: soldiers, angry people and athletes; the Ram;
the Owl; Mars; red; Tiger Lily; Ruby; number one; head, brain, eyes, face,
teeth; and the dream is set in a stadium.

- The beginning of this sounds like mom to the T. She is so active!

oooOOOOooo

HOODY TIME...
da da da da... duh dah duh dah... Hoody time...
[sung to 'hammer time']

Just goes to show

Nothing ever stays the same. Its sad to see glaciers go, but then its not like we can stop time and decide change is bad.

Wrote. Write.Writing.

Thesis Writing

pages of writing

I write for an audience

I wrote non-stop

and I an writing through the last days in the dorms

I will miss writing in my little box

The box I have written in for 6 years

I hate writing poetry

Heheheh

bah

Well cool, I wrote an arrow

I found it first

Heres a Cuteness Overload

So stressed out

One meeting and suddenly I feel as if the walls are closing in.

I have 2 chapters fully written (not fully editted yet) and the others are still in progress. This means only about 37 pages written out of 100 or so? There are 6 weeks left.

Mom wants me to go to Fargo for her birthday this weekend - I just packed my bag. I want to go. I should not, for the love of all that is holy, go. I don't have the time to go gallavanting around Fargo. I want to see my brother and sister-in-law. But, I don't have the time. I just don't.

Why am I packed then? I listened to a message left by mom and she is so excited that we are going. She has to go for her BE stuff.. and wont be there saturday... sunday we have to come right back so I can go to work.

I need to stay home and write all weekend - like I did with MC's comp test. I need to just give in and say - I can't go. Im so sorry mom, I want to but I shouldn't.

That leaves me with 2 choices: Blow off the weekend with half-hearted trying at writing or make my room into study central and ONLY have my paper going, unplug the internet.. ignore D, unplug the phone and .. go yell at the guy blasting his music so loud that my right arm is bouncing around on my flipping counter... stupid ppl... GRRRRRR.. but back to my previous thought... i need to write write write, edit edit edit.

So I stop thinking about it now

Tomorrow:

• Shower/dress
• Wash Clothes
• Eat breakfast
  
• Clean room a bit
• Call AB and AM about numbers
• Call SH about letter
• Gather together materials for other job applications
• Write up a draft of my Teaching Philosophy
• Edit Chapter 2 of thesis - its 17 pgs, hooray!
• Eat Lunch
• Edit Teaching Philosophy
• Edit Chapter 2 some more
• Take half hour break for nap
• Edit some more on Teaching Philosphy
• Take break and eat with D for dinner
• Go to work at 5:45pm
• Edit both papers all night
• Maybe bring a movie for needed break for rest of night

Friday:

• Shower/Dress
• Go to lunch with D and Aspen
• Work on thesis a bit more
• Talk to SH - letters
• Have lunch meeting with DE
• Hand in my chapter(s)
• Mail off my Application Packets - overnight, they are due 27th (monday)!
• Head back to dorm
  
• Pack
• Goof off until D is home
• Meet up with Mom
• Head to Fargooooooo - Which means Saturday is sleeping on floor, shopping, eating, and shooting the breeze with my brother and sister-in-law =) Oh, and buy mom gift for B-Day
  

Note to self

Write your flippin' thesis!
no... dont play Guild Wars
no... don't play MapleStory
no... don't take a nap
no... you can try your new game later
no... don't watch TV
no... don't go shopping
no... don't read a book
no... you got over the cold

just imagine... thesis could be done... could be editting and not worrying... could be working on other papers... could be playing games without guilt!!! hehe

List for tomorrow/Tuesday

1. 9am - shower
2. Eat breakfast
3. Write some chapter for Thesis
4. Noon-Oil Change at Kenny's
5. Read Troilus book for class
6. Call Applebees and Amigo for numbers
7. 6-9pm -Class Troilus
8. Thesis writing
9. Guild Wars? =)

Menohmenah

The BEST thing in the world - love it!
http://www.veoh.com/videoDetails.html?v=e49460f9qttn9J
dooo. dooo do do... menohmenah... do do do do!

My recent list

1. get up at 9
2. shower/dress
3. See D at 10:30am, then eat lunch with Aspen at 11-12
4. Talk to DE about thesis
5. Ask for more letters from DE, MC and SH
6. Head back to room
7. Clean a bit
8. Call about job-letter
9. Give new signs to RA's for Assassins - make sure paperwork is at front desk
10. Call Applebees and Amigo for Numbers
11. Call Bills friend about key
12. Stop at bank with monies
13. Mail Bill his thesis stuff
14. E-Mail Hall Council People
15. Make agenda for meeting
16. Work on thesis chapter for DE
17. Meeting at 9pm - no hall-wide until next week
18. Check out schedule for Ir's days off at end of semester

PSSSST

I just turned 27, 23 minutes ago!


Uhmmm... yeap, that's it hehe - will be still writing my thesis tomorrow - up to 28 pages now - rough draftish

A quote of the day, VIA Thesis

"Mind this, Bergthora," said Hallgerda, "that we shall meet again." - Burnt Njal Saga

Sends shivers down my back. Talk about threat and heat just searing from one eye to the next between these two. If you know what this is from, good for you! These women had backbones and cunning minds - but just not much fear of other's or their own lives (common sense?).

Reprieve through cold??

Well, I have been sick, sick, sick the past couple days. I would sleep all day and then stay up for about half hour to an hour and then back to bed. Today, I feel a bit better but now am thinking I have a lot of e-mails and catching up to do and that's overwhelming. Especially since I am still bone-weary and I have horrible sinuses atm.

Thanks to aspen for her post about Tolkien satire - love it. No tears, but I did giggle a lot. :-)

I have a fishy staying over with me this week when one of my neighbors are gone for spring break. He's sitting here looking at me... he has the plant connectd to the vase and he is resting in the roots - wonder if my fishy would like to have one of those vases again.

Just got back from Country Kitchen with D and Aspen - totally worn out - so I am going to head back to bed and perhaps be better tonight.

Hope rises

I woke up, chewed 3 nails down to the quick (only done this when im VERY upset or nervous) and struggled with the Teaching Philosophy until about 11am. Finally read through the job application needs for the two that are due tomorrow and they didnt want the philosophy, just a letter of interest. WHEW. I dropped the philosophy thing for now and just did a nice, clean rewrite on a letter i wrote for the ARHD position. I then picked up D/E and we went to the post office, dropped off the envelopes and then went to lunch at Raphael's Bakery (Which is actually really good!).

Now, I came back, cleaned up my room (it was BAD... thats what stress does to me - I don't throw up, my room does... hehe) and now am contemplating a nap...

However, i feel good about my life still. I can stick nearer to home, work as a teacher and still be connected to the college - just not taking classes at that time. Maybe that is what is needed and I can just keep that "ultimate goal" in my thoughts as I turn 27 this next week... yes... 27. So close to 30, I can taste it.

Heartburn sucks - st00pid stress - maybe will take that nap.

My cousin is going to come visit me! Yaaaay!

My I-Mood

I just changed my imood - from "loved" to "deflated". I had changed it to "love" on March 14, 2005 and hadn't needed to change it since. That's what D does for me. However, since I have been sitting in the library thinking through this in utter silence for 6 hours (wish I hadn't read the email before work, sigh) I have lost a lot of the puff and been going up and down a lot.

I feel overwhelmed. Aspen threw a rope towards me, that helped some - and D was trying to help me in the 3 seconds I had before I had to leave for work - but its still all me - something *I* have to do and its going to be difficult. But I am willing to bet it will be exciting and that imood is going to be changed as soon as I figure things out.

The one thing that could come from this is that I may not have to live 4+ hours away from those I love. I would have been torn and dying inside and I know it. It may have been a good experience and it definitely would have helped me in my job-goals. But, teaching college english is what I want to do - why should I wait another 4 years, maybe it IS high-time to start teaching again and get in there.

Perhaps there is something to "Beware the Ides of March!"

We regret to inform you...

What a devestating phrase to those of us who were depending on this opportunity in order to achieve that "ultimate goal" (as mentioned in the description of my blog). Is my goal gone? no... just on hiatus. I can wait and see what may happen with the other application letters, but I plan on taking control of my life and not waiting another second to see if someone deems me worthy. I know I can do whatever is put before me, and if this includes having me work for a few years and later getting my P.h.d., so be it. Time to do some serious interviewing - I refuse to go to college for 9 years and end up working in retail.

But, the agony of defeat is so sour - I had to go and read that darn email right before work. Ah well - I seem to be taking it pretty well... I've already passed the self-pity, the mourning of a dream, the anger, and now am stuck in my indignation - ohyes, the pride is still intact.

PS. this post it totaly unrelated to the one before - the anger thing.

List of life

• Get over disappointment
• Supdate Resume
• Type up a letter of interest
• Beg for 3 letters of recommendtions
• Type up a statement of my teaching philosophy.... (any help on this would be appreciated)
• Find my transcripts left over from Phd apps
• Print out my Vita
• Talk to Susan about options
• Look for summer job
• begin looking for apartments - preferably w/pets allowed - need my Bear
  
• Finish thesis this month
• Finish my paperwork
• write paper for DE (Troilus)
• Talk to Rose about comp test
• Write DE's comp test
• Celebrate completion of MC's comp - yay!
• Stop blogging and do this stuff
  

Anger dissipates..

as quickly as the clear skies around here. Bad analogy, but im tired today hehe
So, we have a blizzard, and yet my window is literally wide open and its a soft cool breeze coming in, and i can hear the bundles of flakes sift to the ground, a very soothing sound.

I was the angriest I ever have been in my whole life today. It was shocking - I had no idea. I was actually shaking, in a rage, burning holes into anything near me and ready to take it out on anyone. Since I am a pretty peaceable person, I took it out in a letter and shoved 5 years of repressed emotions into one piece that wrung me out like an used sponge. I had frayed edges and wanted to just cry afterwards/ But, I just ate and decided that id spent enough time being angry and now am enjoying my night off of class. I have a meeting tmorrow with D/E and so I am procrastinating that... by blogging.

But, once I get this out of the way, I can get on with my work. MMM coffee is good for a headache and tired body.

Aya-Library-Midnight

Hehe there is my usual nightly MSN name when I am working.

I was sitting the last 2 hours editing through my chapter of 'gracious hostess' for my thesis... now Im sitting on the stool and trying to read my handwriting scribbled between lines when I suddenly leaned in close enough to be able to tell what music was surrepticiously playing from my headphones under the desk. "Ghostbusters"!! I started singing and just wiggling all over - love those little surprises that life can throw your way.

That movie had been my favorite when I was little. I can remember planting myself in front of the TV for a long day of ghostbuster watching. I would play, hit rewind, and play again. Over and over, until someone else wanted to see something. I guess it was probably a good babysitter. I had grandiose dreams of marrying Peter Venkman and dressing like Dana Barrett. I loved the movie and I obsessed about it like a 5-6 year old only can.

This wasn't the same love I had for Mr. Rogers... or yes, even Michael Jackson (the pre-'scary' version). Oh yes, I even stacked my books the way the ghost librarian did in the movie.

But, that childhood is gone, but the love of the movie is still there. I watched it with D a couple weeks ago and I found myself still laughing and dreaming. Ah, got to love the 80s.

A list is all I have energy for

• I like hockey.. KAPOW
• Mom has made a good choice
• I need to go to bed around midnight from now on, not 2am- went to bed at midnight last night and I feel better than I usually do
• I made an ankle bracelet with D's mom
• I now know how to put up a slatted wooden ceiling - and loved the look
• Im tired
• Im procrastinating on thesis as I type - it's hand written in front of me, waiting for me to click on Word - but I accidentally clicked on IE. heheh
• I still want to see the movie this weekend
• I need coffee and food

Geez, even MSN is telling me I'm slackin'!

Pisces

February 18 - March 19

Get your head out of the clouds, dear Pisces. You will find that nitpicky details you failed to attend to earlier are now coming back to haunt you. Do not postpone your work any further. The time to take care of the job is now. Balance your checkbook and do your laundry. Clean your bathtub and go shopping. The more you accomplish today, the better you will feel about yourself tomorrow.

Heheh this is me in a nutshell - 'cept shopping is bad... very bad ehehe - my nitpicky details aren't being done and its a sort of ... ignorant bliss. It's the waiting I am doing:

• Was I accepted to UM? Do I still want to leave everyone behind
  
• Will I get a job? a fun one
  
• Will I have a place to stay? If I left
• Will I have enough money? bleh
  
• Am I ready to leave? I may be 27 this march, but im still 13 sometimes
  
• Will my thesis be written in time? damn right it will grrrrr
• Will my thesis have a point? oh cripes, I hope so
• Will I get all that paperwork done?
• Will my mom be ok?
• Will I be worthy enough to get a Phd? Do I know enough? Do I feel like I belong there? Oh good lord - I need to learn a LOT more than I do now. Shouldn't I feel like I own the world? That confidence thing? I seem to only have specialized knowledge and still don't know everything about that... /blah #2
  

Scared me to death

ok, 2am and im like listening to the preview with my nose almost to the screen when /BANG. you'll know what im talking about when you watch this. I want to see this SO bad! Nightwatch -new epic/horror trilogy oooOOOOooo gimme gimme gimme

The following is quoted from the main site "Story":

For as long as humanity has existed, there have been "Others" among us;
Witches, Vampires and Shape-Shifters who are soldiers in the eternal war between
Light and Dark.
Light Others protect mankind from Dark Others, who plague and
torture humans.
Over 1000-years ago a truce was struck between Gesser, Lord
of the Light, and Zavulon, General of Darkness. They agreed that no one could be
forced to good or evil, people must choose freely for themselves. To uphold this
truce, each side established underground forces; the soldiers of the Light would
be called Night Watch, making sure Dark Others obeyed the truce. And the
soldiers of Darkness would be called Day Watch, to do the same.
Ancient
prophecy foretells that one day the Great One will arrive who can end the threat
of an apocalyptic battle between Light and Dark Others. That day has come, and
the Great One, once he or she is identified, must choose whether to destroy the
light within or battle the surrounding darkness. This choice will reveal
mankind's destiny.
1992:Anton Gordesky, a broken-hearted man, desperate to
win back his fiancée, seeks out the black magic services of a witch. This Dark
Other, about to use her magic for evil, is arrested by the Night Watch moments
before for completing her spell. The cataclysmic event awakens Anton to discover
that he is an Other. Now he must choose whether to become a protector of light
or warrior of darkness.
Today:Somewhere on the streets of Moscow the "Great
One" wanders, oblivious to his or her powers. Anton, along with his Night Watch
team, race to find and protect the Great One from Zavulon and his Day Watch
vampires who seek to plunge the world into darkness. Whoever reaches the Great
One first will hold the balance of power in their hands and control the fate of
humanity.
NIGHT WATCH (NOCHNOI DOZOR) is the first installment of a trilogy
based on the best-selling Russian sci-fi novels of Sergei Lukyanenko (which also
includes Day Watch and Dusk Watch). This visionary horror fantasy film features
a dazzling mix of mind-blowing effects, adrenaline-fuelled action and
suspenseful terror.
NIGHT WATCH (NOCHNOI DOZOR) was an instant smash hit in
its native Russia when it was released in July 2004 shattering all previous box
office records. Made for a mere $4 million, the film surpassed both LORD OF THE
RINGS: THE RETURN OF THE KING and SPIDER-MAN 2 at the Russian box office.
Internationally acclaimed, it was also Russia's contender for the 2004 foreign
language Oscar® award.

I should be doing my thesis

Note to self:

Do your thesis! DO EEEET! Stop goofing off!!!

This message brought to you by a grad student who has drive issues - someone who is denying that it is in fact March and she *should* be graduating in May. A Grad student who only has ONE Comp test done and should do the second ASAP and then look for that elusive third. A grad student who is going to start having tummy cramps worse and worse as each day goes by. If this had been a real emergency, the following Agonizing soundsof worry and moaning/b*tching would have been followed by the choking laughter of someone on the edge of reasoning. Thank you for your patronage. Would you like fries with that? Carry On! Make it work! Doo beee dooo... yup, its gone.

Maybe I'll go write about the welcomer of my thesis chapters.... that may work.

I hafta blog this...

I was talking to one of the other girls about schoolwork and she had some interesting books sitting on the counter (all about medical subjects). One in particular caught my eye, not because of its subject, but the implications of its aesthetic properties. Check this out:


The Merck Manual is a dictionary of medical terms (from what I understood) This has some interesting rhetorical properties, don't you think? Even the paper is a lot like that thin paper found in the bible. Now, I am not one to talk about religion on my blog, so I will leave that alone. But, I just found the whole situation thought provoking. Science/Medicine vs God...

Of course, I could do a search and probably find other books that look just as similar - maybe its cheaper to make it that way and so they are bound in the same fashion - but I enjoyed wondering what this meant... The old vs the new, or maybe a sort of truce that has been on for ages... a tenuous truce at best. Or am I just too behind and ignorant of the issues today - whatever they may be?

One Comp down...

...two to go. A thank you goes out to Dr. MC for working with me and getting back to me so quickly!

I'll look at posting it on the web for others to check out - along with live links of where I got the information. It was a fascinating subject.. to say the least!

No pictures for the post this time. I'm working tonight so I plan on typing up some pretty good drafts of my thesis chapter - I think I need to think of each chapter as a paper in itself and just write a seperate thesis statement for each in order to feel like I can do this. We'll see after tnight if it's successful.

G.D. idiots and their lighters!

It pisses me off. Some people should be dragged out in the street and shot (verbatim from one of my family's sayings when we're peeved)

Seriously, check out the pictures. This was done at 4am (heard through the grapevine) and it just makes me mad. Why someone would intentionally try to burn us down is beyond me!


The first two pictures are from one of the 1st floor wings. The bulletin board where you post the announcements for the campus (apparently they burned them all) and there is the floor where it looks like the burning papers must have fallen down and singed the carpet while they smoldered.








The red paper pushed over is another bulletin board that had been covered up to hide the burning marks - UGH.


The pile of magazines is in the front lobby near the Oak front desk and it seems they tried to get the stack set on fire (which is incidentally next to a flammable sofa and a wooden beam within the lobby).






Why can't people respect others and not try to kill us? From what I know (as I was up til 5am) I didn't hear a fire alarm - so the damage and fire scare may not be as bad as I think - but it barely makes me feel better. I'd like to know why someone tried to burn us down - as I've heard over and over again, it only takes about 5 minutes for a whole dorm room to be up in flames.

OMG

k, 1st draft is up and runnin. I now know too much 'bout the internet dialect, or "chat speak". I am going googly eyed, but I *do* have that first draft!!

Listening to: Once in a Lifetime" by Talking Heads.

Lights are off. Window is open, computer being all glowy and I have my door open behind me. People are hanging out in certain rooms and most are gone for the weekend. Everything is nice and slow - and I have a belly full of hotwings from Pizza Hut :P

My rough draft - VERY rough. I am hoping I knew what I was talking about. It's been about 3 years since I had rhetoric! But, I found articles from my class and other times.

Jeremy came in and teased me about posting pictures of my desk again... i need new material huh? hmmmmmm.....There. My other eye image that washed out. I look very tired... hehe and why my eyes were that green that day, who knows.

Day 1 comes to a close at 1am sharp

Yep, going to bed early... early for me ;-)
I have read through my earlier articles and find I have a lot to say on the subject on "chat speak" or "1337" language, or even the later version influenced and influencing - "txt"ing.

I have tons of links I'll throw into my blog after I have my paper written and will see if I can post that too. It is a very interesting topic for me since I have been there for most every step it has gone through - from the first days of Doom "chat" and mIRC to MSN messanger then to the txt messages on my phone and now learning another set of "chat" rules as I learn to play Guild Wars in the last few weeks.

Composition Test #1

Ah yeah, I am listening to Butthole Surfers, eating Crunch'nMunch, a couple fruit drinks in the fridge - including frappucinos - and some other snacks are around for my grazing pleasure.
Day #1 is going well - I did stay up too late last night, 2:30 after working library and coming home to make sure my computer was up to par after being rewired-and so I was tired when I woke up this morning to check my topic: Chat Speak.

I got up at 9am and e-mailed an RSVP and then did some research for articles on my own computer and printed out some I needed. Took my shower, grabbed D and went to lunch at Wallys. After lunch I walked with him to the Academic buildings and I went to the library from noon - 3pm and he and I walked back after he worked.

By this time, though, I was totally the walking dead. Felt all light and sleepy - so took my normal nap - 'cept it turned into my normal nap+2. I slept until 5:15pm! Ugh.

But, I'm awake and slowly becoming conscious of my surroundings (which, is terrible cuz I haven't washed clothes and I was interrupted doing so yesterday and so clothes are all over my floor) and ready to run to Wally's for dinner and then come back to work the rest of the night. I have a lot of reading to do.




Here's a day-time photo of my computer I took this morning. It now has pink guts!!! hehe It looks good :-) My fairy, however, is buried behind wires and may need to be extracted by gentle means.

Pictures - Yay computer works hhehe

Here are the pictures I have been taking recently. The first is the new and improved computer... glowy as ever and looking good. Can't see the glowy red stuff though, which is too bad. Looks all 3-D now - different.

Also, the other three pictures are from the gorgeous snow storm we had yesterday or day before - can't remember hehe

Pictures are turning out better and better tho - I think.

I am debating

Whether I want to keep that Nadeen blog or not. It just seems to be a waste of space for what little time I'll use it - what's left but a couple months. Perhaps I could make certain posts all in italics within this one to suggest a change in persona - instead of making a whole other space.

It is pretty however.

I brought all my stuff for my thesis today, nothing else but the DVD Airplane. I always have to have that backup plan, don't I?

Also, I and D went to eat and stopped at Blockbuster, they had his new case. That sucker is huge! I feel it has *just* as much bling as mine.... just in a manly way ;) Oh, and N at Asgard told me that she got to hear about my case (I'm famous) and wished she'd been there. I may hafta find something else wrong with it and bring it in hehehe

They need to update their website, I would do it for them if they wanted! For some favors back with my compy.. of course hehehe

You may have noticed

I did revamp my whole website. Call it procrastination, call it cleaning house, call it bored... whatever it is, it is mine and now I am happy. I may mess with it more, but I personally like the cleaner look.

However, I would rather be next door right now so I think I will walk away finally and go seek out D. He keeps popping in here off and on to talk to me but I was so engrossed in the blog that I didn;t pay much attention. And it's getting later, so I need to go snuggle his butt before he goes to bed. He's starting to look like I do at 2am - MY bedtime.

Nadeen on Guild Wars

nadeen, originally uploaded by ayleen_marie.

Meow?

In the works

• Article Review for Troilus and Criseyde
• Laundry
• Mike's Comp Test
• Pay bills
• Write up notes for 2 more articles for thesis
• Thesis chapter for Deanna
• New Blog Template
• New Game
• Sleeeeeeeeep :-)
  

flowers1

flowers1, originally uploaded by ayleen_marie.

Another way in which I took a picture. More green... not sure how to to use the darn camera yet. :P hehe But lovely flowers nonetheless.

flowers2

flowers2, originally uploaded by ayleen_marie.

Trying out different ways to take pictures with my camera. Larger view of my flowers from D.

petals

petals, originally uploaded by ayleen_marie.

D bought me at the auction for $70 and said that was my present. He lied! hehe I came home last night at 9pm and these were waiting for me along with a card. T'was a good V-Day.

The 6 things I am allowed to fear at this moment

1. Not having a job in the summer
2. Not graduating this semester
3. Not finding a place to live
4. Not being hired to teach
5. Not being hired as RHD
6. Getting my Loan bills for first time and being dirt poor and unable to support myself.

The stipulations to this is that I will not allow myself to worry about other fears - I have 6 already and cannot dwell on any others as my head will collapse in on itself and then explode with enough force to send a gale of wind into the neighboring states.

Not finishing my Thesis in time
Not having my Comp tests finished in time
Not getting into PHD program - Came True
Getting into a PHD program and moving away from D, family, and friends

YAY

Ahhhhh... Much better... I missed my WTF!

Im a 10 second star! Ok, maybe 30 seconds

I was just interviewed by KBSU - check it out tonight at 8pm. Im going to try and record it.

argh, nerve wracking!!!!

Tuesday, February 7, 2006
My Interview - bad quality, but I just used my Digital Camera to film it off my VCR hehe. Sorry- I'm not that tech Savvy. And I wiggle way too much when I talk - Look at the hand action! Whoo.

BTW, the sound may be off from the picture, ill hafta figure something else out - at least I have the video of it hehe

Selling Myself on the Market - Wednesday!

That's right! I am going onto the stage and will sell myself at the Oak Hall 14th Annual Bachelor/Bachelorette Auction this Wednesday at 7pm! I am in a relationship - but I figure for charity D could lend me out to whoever buys me :-)

I hope all of you can make it! It's in Oak Hall 2nd floor lounge. Come on out and help us!

My South Park Character - MiniAya

South Park Character Generator

And here's my rendition of Aspen :0)

AAAAAAAAaaa rrrrrrrrrrrrrnnnnnnnnnnhhhh, HHHurrRRRRRRRRnhhhh. UUUHHHGGG-rrrr! UUUHHHGGG-rrrrRRR! UUUHHHGGG-rrrrRRR! HHHurrRRRRRRRRnhhhh. AAAAAAAAaaa r

RAWR - ASPEN CHECK IT OUT!

Well, it seems the bandwidth was too much for that poor guys' blog and it is now dead. Let us now take a moment and remember the Chewy page as it was.

Oy vey - got nothing done today

It's completely pathetic.. I wake up at 10am, take a shower and beging *thinking* about what I should do for the day and then I crawl back into bed at around noon and wallow in a headache.

Then I make myself get up to go do something and Jer comes in to say he'd like his couch. We go to my house and lo and behold, no keys for the truck so we can't get it. So, we head to the Old School House for art supplies and then back to the dorm. My headache has gone full blown by then and Jer gives me a sinus headache pill that conks me right out. I wake up to three flippin phonecalls but i was never fast enough to get them before they hung up. And then finally by D.

And so we went to eat, I ran off with Aspen for 2nd dinner (hehe i'm a hobbit) and then came to work. At least here, maybe I can get some work done. The library is my secret weapon of defense against lethargy! Love that word.

• E-Mail MCM
• Stop at my places for donations
• Map out Lounge
• Wash Clothes
• Get my Ski'ing stuff rdy (BV 7/7 night! Whoot)
• Talk Aspen into Ski'ing - /puppy dog eyes
  

My Blog Sucks Day

"She turned it into a newt"

"A newt?!"

"......... It got better..."

My blog sucks in some random universe where they cannot tell what is awesomeness and what is suxors, and so I will salute that other universe, parallel universe, cosmic split in the ... cosmos... in which they believe my blog sucks.

Perhaps we need a phrase for this...

Happy Blogsucking Day!

Argh

Well, I joined Facebook - even after saying to everyone I knew that I was never ever going to.. never going to even LOOK at it... and look at me - im already addicted :P Oh the pictures uploading is completely awesome!

I got my car back today - only 550, compared to the 1000+ I was expecting. Apparently along with all my other problems a mouse went and crawled up into a valve and nested there. I guess when I started my car up again, it got sucked up and keeled. poor thing, but what an expensive animal :P But, the people at National Transmition were nice to me and they made my baby work like it never has before! I don't have a "check engine" light on anymore! I've Never seen that before in my '97 Mercury Mystique! That light has been on since I got the car - "It's just a short, nothing wrong with it" is what all the Ford places told me - what a bunch of idiots. They screw me out of my money (long story, short = concerning a burnt out AC/Heater, a recall after being fixed, and lack of refund), say nothing is wrong ... and I promise you, I will not be going to Ford dealers ever again. I can list all the other problems I have had, but there's no point. I found websites with it all listed already - so if you are looking at buying one or fixing one - just take a look at some of the reviews. A few like the car, very few love, and many hate. Personally, it is my baby and she has been everywhere from Texas to here and she is paid for - no payments! And I'd like to keep it that way.

ooohhh. new camera brings so many options!

I brought the little camera with me to class. Not because I was going to use it, or that I *thought* i may use it, but just cuz I could. It's such a tiny little thing, 12 MP and yes.. with built in memory, I can take 4 fine, humongous pictures... hehe I need to figure out exactly how to get them scaled down a bit and to use my memory that I have. I can update with a 2 gig mem stick... we'll see. :)

Oh, and of course I now need a Flicker account.. or something. Better get working on that ASAP! hehe

And here is my computer at night... love it. Kinda bright tho... especially at night, in a tiny dorm... /shrug. Ah well, I gotta love the blinkies and glowy things !

New Camera

My new computer from over Christmas break. Yes, I have made it embellished and all girly!
I'm getting used to the focus and lighting and such - so bare with me. :)


Thanks to ImageShack for [URL=http://imageshack.us]Free Image Hosting[/URL]

Oh yah side note

WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA


Come back... Please!

M & M's

mmm.. im sitting in the library, harsh lights, my jeans are new and digging into my tummy, my hair seems plastered to my head (time for new haircut), a fan is giving me chills on the neck, but the rest of me is warm, I'm staring at a single pretty blue M&M on the desk and watching people wal in and out of the doors. Now one of my guys behind the check-out desk got stolen for the dungeon (basement level compy lab) and we're back to just me and one guy behind check-out. Oh well, we'll be ok, just for another hour or so anyway - YAY!

I finished my oral report on Courtly Love... and it took longer than it should have - I read the whole book and made some good notes... lol this was spose to be just a smll thing. Ah well... overachiever wins again!

Ew, I just realized I dumped my M&Ms onto the counter where tons of germs are... 3 second rule - 3 min rule? They are coated rather well.. minimum contact because or the shape..... heh

Breathing

Well, I did finally calm down this morning but it took a lot of homework swamping me and some music to get me moving again. I have a feeling I am going to have this problem every morning until I get settled next year.

I am excited about Nanny Mcphee - the movie coming out this weekend. I have some guesses on the movie and when I checked out the website, I feel that I am right. I kept telling D about my theory and making him watch the previews closely and told him what I thought. I don't think he's sold - but from clues given, I feel that I figured it out :) :) Yah, I rock... im such a nerd tho.. sigh. Wish there was money involved in predicting movies ;) Mostly they just give you a knuckle sandwiche... right Aspen? hehe

I am ahead on my homework for this next Tuesday... so I am free to look up some info on Courtly love for a quick report next Tuesday and then to just work on my thesis the rest of the week.

And so the anxiety begins...

I'm waking up with a large twist in my chest and wanting to burrow under the covers and hide. I still feel like I'm 13 or so with adult problems and I think, "What the hell was I thinking, I can't do this?!"

But, I must. I've been working toward this last semester for over 8 years and with the help from wonderful professors, I made it to this point. But is this point too much? Am I going to make it?

What happens after this point? I've got another factor in my life, D. I don't want to leave him for more than a year to four. I don't want to. But, then, what's left in Bemidji? I'd have to find some sort of job I am happy with. And then, what happens? I'm stuck here with no chance to continue my education? My goal is to still be a college professor - I want to teach the Old English texts, Icelandic sagas, Marie de France and even a bit 'o Chaucer. I want to be happy, be with D and enjoy life to the fullest. These two goals need to mesh together, otherwise, I am going to be unhappy in some way.

OK, time to move around and feel like I can accomplish something.

• shower
• eat
• read more Troilus and Crisseyde
• E-Mail Hall Council
• Begin planning an outline

Think, only third week, only the third week, its only the third week, im ok, i can get this stuff done. it is only the third week, ill be fine. I need to organize my time for testing and writing. it is only the third week.

Copycat ;)

Yep, Aspen did it first - but she seems to be finding these neat little quiz thingy's - too much fun.

you are blueviolet #8A2BE2

Your dominant hues are blue and magenta. You're the one who goes to all the parties but doesn't quite fit in at every one... you know what you want, but are afraid of what the world might think of it. You're a little different and that's okay with them, and if you're smart it's okay with you too. Your saturation level is higher than average - You know what you want, but sometimes know not to tell everyone. You value accomplishments and know you can get the job done, so don't be afraid to run out and make things happen. Your outlook on life is bright. You see good things in situations where others may not be able to, and it frustrates you to see them get down on everything.

the spacefem.com html color quiz

I want

I always want something hehe
I want a digital camera... I want the Euphoria (CK) and Burberry Brit, I wanna go shopping, but when I do.. I absolutely don't want to buy what I find. Maybe its Bemidji, maybe its a good subconscious editor yelling at me about my debts, or MAYBE I ... oh I don't think I can think of another reason.

Hehehe

At least I smell good from rubbing my wrists against those magazine inserts that have all these perfumes in them. Poor D is subjected to, "what you think?" and then I shove my wrist under his nose and he sniffs, thinks and then sometimes says, "meh" or "hmmm". I don't think we like the same scents hehe. I guess I go for the more citrusy fruity, flowery scents and he was looking more at the musky smells. Ihave adverse reaction to musky perfumes cuz mom has always liked those. I guess I just like to smell different :)

Im really lazy right now. I can't seem to get much work done. I need classes hehe. I didn't know I'd be so .. lost at sea... without having structured daytimes where I am supposed to do things at certain times. Freetime means too much freetime. I always say, oh i'll get this done.. and this. But then I do all those little errands and my day is over... I am stuck without having done the actually important things. Hmmm... something needs to change.

An ode to 2am

I worked late tonight
I came home and watched tv
I turned off my light
but my computer called to me
SIMS was to be

SERIOUSLY! Ewwww and HUH?

I was checking out my webtracker to see who's been hitting my blog and such.. well I checked out the "search words and phrases" that people are using to find my website and there are some seriously disturbing searches out there:

(It's even slightly embarassing to ME that my blog would show up... bleh- stupid search engines)

16 Jan, Mon, 20:00:15	MSN Search: college life
16 Jan, Mon, 20:25:12	Yahoo: pictures of sexual life of horse
16 Jan, Mon, 22:40:57	Google: daily naaaughty
17 Jan, Tue, 06:29:04	Yahoo: naughty america college sex
17 Jan, Tue, 09:41:16	MSN Search: college boys getting off
17 Jan, Tue, 13:37:22	Yahoo: buying skis, pictures
17 Jan, Tue, 13:58:53	MSN Search: college blog
17 Jan, Tue, 13:59:59	MSN Search: college blog
18 Jan, Wed, 02:47:41	Yahoo: ayleen tv blogs
18 Jan, Wed, 10:55:21	Google: aspen bedding menards
18 Jan, Wed, 12:37:47	MSN Search: college life
18 Jan, Wed, 13:15:38	MSN Search: college life
18 Jan, Wed, 21:08:43	MSN Search: college life
19 Jan, Thu, 08:26:37	Google: "build your own beetle"
19 Jan, Thu, 09:53:57	Google: ayleen blog
19 Jan, Thu, 10:07:00	Yahoo: college life and the stress it causes
19 Jan, Thu, 12:33:10	MSN Search: trying to live the college life
19 Jan, Thu, 13:10:56	MSN Search: Pictures of College life
19 Jan, Thu, 18:53:40	Yahoo: college life pictures
19 Jan, Thu, 19:17:24	Google: choppy current haircuts

WOW, huh?
What in the world could I be talking about to get this kind of result to my blog? I'm wondering what these people think when they run into such an innocent blog - I can almost feel their nasty eyes on my blog /shudder.

Ok take for example the "Naughty america college sex" search, my blog showed up with this: ... the life of a College Graduate and the saga of ... help your child get through the 'naughty-ness' of life ... Internet Un-Safe Sex, Everquest Bloggers, and a good friend ...
This link is to the actual page they would have encountered... I don't think they found what they wanted heh heh heh. As some will see... I was blogging things for a class... and I guess that is what got the searchers attention. /shrug. That's too bad for you, nasty person! neener.

Can I write, like in my diary when I was about 10, "STAY OUT!" across the front? Although, I'd need to put a subtitle there, such as
"STAY OUT if you are a pervert!"