Aya: 4 1/2 weeks

Dear Landyn,

This month has gone so fast. The first week, your father was able to stay home with us and help get us into a routine. The second week, we had some bonding time together. We'd stare at each other for hours and I rarely put you down.

The third week was Thanksgiving. Aspen came to visit for the week and we had many visitors and places to be. You were an angel throughout. You got many compliments of your coloring (you have your father's olive skin) and they all say you've gotten your own facial features and are very distinctive. You seem to have your Dad's chin, my lips and nose, and your dad's face shape. We are still unsure of your eyes and are waiting anxiously to see what color they take on (they have blue, grey, green and hazel at the moment). When you smile, which is surely gas bubbles, your eyes turn up in crescent shapes and you are completely adorable.

This fourth week, you have found your voice more. You have been getting cranky at times when you need to go take a nap and I am slowly figuring out that I need to be the mom and *make* you go to bed and not just let you stay awake because you are fighting it. So, we have rocked, sang (many many Christmas songs), and allowed you to fuss in your crib until you finally realize that it is time for bed.

I have taken MANY pictures and am one of those doting mothers who is constantly jumping up to check your breathing, make sure your pacifier is either in or pulled away from your face (You spit it out more than keep it in your mouth), and that you are not spitting up and laying in a cold puddle of it.

Feeding time is absolutely hilarious. You get so impatient, your little right arm just waves back and forth in quick jerks and your little mouth smacks and opens/closes as you stare at me. I kiss your cheek and you pull your lips toward me, which indicates you are definitely ready! At the beginning, you were 3 ounces, then 3 1/2 for a week, and now the past week and half we have gone to 4 ounces. You seem to want more, but when we do, you spit it up all over me or Daddy. So, we will stick to 4 ounces a bit longer.

We usually feed you around 7pm, bed at 9pm, eat again at midnight, another time at 5am, then 9am, then about 1pm, 4p, etc. I am getting some bad migraines from staying up late (I have to pump for an extra 20 mins or so after you are fed and back into bed), but you make it all worhtwhile with just a smile or look.

Daddy figured out how to play with you before I did. He began tickling your sides and stomach and you will grunt and wiggle. So, I started copying that and smooching your neck and raspberries on your tummy, tickling sides and underarms. You wiggle quite a lot and make great cooing sounds. You also adore your playmat on the floor. You absolutely love the mirror on it and stare at it for quite a while. The only problem is that the floor gets chilly and I always worry about you getting too cold - I will grab you up and snuggle you a lot if I feel the breeze through the door is coming in too much. I have figured a way to get a room heater and pillows against the door to try and remedy that problem.

I only have one more month before I go back to work full time. I wish I had a few months more. I want to be with you 24 hours and see all the changes you go through - uh oh, helicopter parent alert! - but I know and understand that one of these days, you are going to want to do something on your own and I'll have to be content with evenings and weekends while you live your life. That is, until your a teenager.